A bit of bitching

It's rare I bother to bitch about things, especially of late. We all have problems and they are becoming more and more prevalent. You turn on the news and are bombarded by problems. Drama comes at us from every angle.

But sometimes, you just get terribly angry and the emotion just consumes you. And so, it must be released. I know the likelihood of anyone reading this is nil, but this way at least it has been released from my head and into a bunch of digital bits.

So here it is: First, I have admittedly been fiscally irresponsible. The debt I accrued is mine, and mine alone to pay off. And it is my desire to be honorable. On the same token, I hate to be made a slave of, to be expected to not eat and not take care of myself as that debt is paid off. Unfortunately, that is precisely what the collectors expect of me.

Thursday nite, January 29th, I was terribly insulted by the manager of a debt collection agency working for Bank of America. I owe them a lot of money. I haven't paid anything on it in six months. It is certainly my intention to do so, but when I was working only part time while driving 100 miles a day, how am I expected to make payments? Especially while I have car payments. At that time, my car was much more a priority than the other debts.

So now it is six months later. The economy is crashing, the corporate loving Bush Administration is gone, and these guys are fearful I will never pay them back. So, they pull all their cards. Now, if I do not pay them off, in full, by the end of the month (and bare in the mind, this is January 29th) then I will be taken to court. The courts will likely favor them, as admittedly I do owe them money. My car will likely be taken away AND my checks garnished, meaning it is no longer a private matter. But I have nothing in the bank, no savings, because I have been living paycheck to paycheck for the past eight months. So now this guy verbally assaults me, telling me how ignorant and irresponsible I am, how I probably suffer similar problems in my personal life... told that I should be responsible, take a payday loan out to pay them off, or get the money from my parents. First, isn't that what got me into this trouble in the first place, taking out a loan? How is that responsible? Second, it is my debt, not my parents. It doesn't help matters that my parents are both in debt too. They have their own concerns.

Up until this past summer, I was working an internship with US Steel, for two years. For those two years and then some, I'd been enrolled in a debt consolidation program, making payments, in a timely manner, up until I was assaulted in October of 2006. Even after the assault, I rarely fell behind, maybe two, three times at most. And those I caught up with. So really, to suggest that I did not want to honor my debt, to suggest that I was being irresponsible ... it was unfair. This guy was yelling at me, busy trying to make me angry and to break me in order to either get me into the courts and raped that way .. or to break me and deliver money sent from the gods.

Well, he broke me. Not that I have the money, but today I was paid. They agreed to take a large payment now.. enough that paying my rent AND having food is going to be difficult. I think I'll manage. But then they want a larger payment in February. And I am sorry, but a larger payment will not be possible.

It pisses me off, this inhumane treatment. Really, is that not inhumane? The concern is more about money than it is about a person being able to eat and keep a roof over their head.

The second thing that angers me was hearing that a friend of mine risks being deported back to Mexico. Yes, he was here illegaly. But so what? When did it become legal to require payment of thousands of dollars in order for a person to have a chance, at coming here? A remote chance, and there will be no guarantee, no refund.

How did this country, the US of A get it's start? From immigrants. These were people that were leaving behind their homeland, it's prejudices and hardships for the hardships of this country, but in order to make a better life, a better society. And you know what? We are telling those same sort of people now a big "FUCK YOU."

Is that not completely hypocritical? These are people that are willing and want to work hard in order to make a better life for themselves, for their family .. to put food on their table regularly .. and we say no. Why? Simple. Because we think we are better than them. We are being prejudiced, thinking that they are less than us because of their heritage, their skin color, their background, their language.. it's digusting. In the area I live, 70, 80, 90 years ago, you could walk into the mines and hear people speaking 20+ languages. They worked their asses off and made this life for our people today. But those sacrifices are being not only found unworthy, but contradicted.

Maybe, maybe these things will change. I have hope that they might. Obama being elected was a step in the right direction. It gives us all hope .. but now, we each need to be individually empowered to make corrections. To make life better, to make life more fair, more equal, more humane...